The Reluctant Blogger

An Unexpected Gift From My Other 10-Year-Old Baby

Posted on by rrapier33

Ten years ago, I completed one of the most arduous and difficult things I have ever done. The result of that work also happens to be what I consider one of my greatest achievements. I don’t know its exact slot on the officially ranked list, but I feel safe in saying it is definitely Top 10. And what is this life-changing achievement? In 2013, I officially finished my one and only novel, The Reluctant Blogger. It would go on to be published by Cedar Fort Publishing in August of that same year.

In the months that followed, I got to experience firsthand what it is like to have something you have put all of your heart and soul into-something you cherish almost as if it were your own child-placed in the public domain. I got to experience what it is like to be critically analyzed by people who know what writing is truly about, and by people who don’t have a freaking clue. And for the most part, all I could do as the reviews rolled in during the waning months of 2013 and the early days of 2014, was take it.

By and large, people were very kind. The reviews from book bloggers were overwhelmingly positive and as people started to post their reactions on sites like Goodreads.com and Amazon, the good feelings about my work greatly outweighed the negative Nancys who felt that the time spent reading my prose was on par with a lunchtime visit to the DMV.

However, there was one individual who is an author himself that reviewed my book whose opinions I took very seriously. His name is Theric Jepson and he is a scholar, a novelist, and a more than qualified critic who kindly agreed to read my book. He told me upfront that he would get to it when he felt like it. He also stated that he offered no guarantees, but if he felt so inclined, he might review it one of the multiple journalistic platforms he contributes to.

That initial communication happened in the fall of 2013. I would end up waiting approximately six months before I would hear anything from him again. In fact, I had pretty much given up and accepted that there would be no review. However, in February of 2014, I received an email from Mr. Jepson informing me that he had completed my book and had published not one…but THREE reviews of my book…on THREE different websites. The first review was a complete breakdown of all that he felt was wrong with my book. It was substantial. The second was a review that highlighted what he liked about my book. It was a bit shorter. And the third was a deeper dive into the issues I addressed and how well he felt I accomplished what he believed I was trying to say. The website on which the positive review was posted is now defunct, so that kind of sucks. The other two live on in the links provided below. But suffice it to say, he liked my characters and felt that their experience was real. He HATED my attempt at a unique novel structure. In reading his critiques, I couldn’t argue with his assessment. If I were to write the book again, I would definitely take his suggestions and try to implement most if not all of them. Finally, he felt I addressed some important topics, but was possibly not on point with my assessment in every case. Final analysis, if he had given the book a grade based on the three different posts all added together, I believe it would have landed at around a C-.

When I finished reading what he had to say, I will admit to being a little disappointed. But on the other hand, I had to acknowledge that he had given me not just a review, but an in-depth three-part review. That he had been moved to do so seemed a win in and of itself.

I had forgotten about those three reviews, as I have forgotten about most every review I received on my book. To be honest, I rarely think about my book at all anymore. But every so often, I Google myself and read some of those old reviews just to be reminded that I gave some folks out there in this great big ol’ world we live in a positive experience once upon time. (Yes, I am that vain.)

Well, today was one of those days I decided to look back. And, lo and behold, I came across a follow-up blog post that I had not seen before. It was published in 2016, two years to the day after the three I mentioned above. I could try to share with you what the following words made me feel, but I would fail. So instead, I will print them below and I think you’ll be able to figure it out yourselves.

And as a final thought: Thank you so very much for this follow-up Theric Jepson. My gratitude is only seven years late, but it is as heartfelt as I can express.

Revisiting The Reluctant Blogger

Those of you with excellent memories or a fetish for reluctant bloggers may recall that two years ago today I posted, simultaneously here at AMV and over at MMM and at the AML blog, three takes on Ryan Rapier’s then recent novel. In writing this post, I’m intentionally not reviewing those reviews, but I suspect if you added them up and divided by three you would get a moderately negative take. And if I were to reread them now, I would probably remember all the things I complained about and I might lose my way in this remembrance of the novel.

See, for all its flaws of structure and point of view, I still think about the characters of The Reluctant Blogger all these years later. I think mostly of the protag’s father’s second marriage and of the pain the protag causes his love interest. These things—or, rather, these people are still with me. I think of them regularly.

And, in my opinion, the most important aspect of good fiction is characters who live on in the mind. It’s why Jane Eyre might be my favorite novel. Because I still think about Jane. I love Jane. She’s, like, my very good friend.

And The Reluctant Blogger also provided me with new friends.

So with that in mind, regardless of whatever I’ve said in the past, I recommend it.

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It’s a Mom’s World

Posted on by rrapier33

I know I am going to take it on the chin for this one…but so be it.

I serve as 2nd counselor in the bishopric of my ward in Thatcher, AZ. Our bishopric has been in now for just over four years and so we just experienced our fifth Mother’s Day. I love my wife and I love my mother and I have no problem taking a day to appreciate all that mothers do for their families. But as with all good things in this world, even the greatest traditions need a review now and then to make sure they are operating in the most effective way. I think we have arrived at this place with regard to Mother’s Day. My reasoning? Well…

1. Every ward I know of gives away something to every adult female in their congregation. I have no problem with this. But over the last few years, I have heard some grumblings. (Not all of these are necessarily from my ward. In fact, most are not.) Some folks are upset if they don’t get chocolate. Some are upset if they do get chocolate because what are we suggesting? That all women should eat sweets and get fat? Or if we give out potted flowers that can be planted. Why did they do that? We live in Arizona. They are just going to die anyway? Why did they give me a single carnation? Now I have to carry this around all day while trying to get to get my kids to class…

REALLY?

How about we give the mothers in our ward the exact same thing we give our fathers on Father’s Day. BIG FAT NOTHING!!! It’s a free gift of appreciation for heaven’s sake, not an annual bonus.

Now again, I want to emphasize that the grumbling I have heard comes from a small minority. But isn’t that the way this always works? The small minority makes all the noise. Nevertheless, the grumbling is out there.

2. There is a notion that exists that no woman should have to speak in church on Mother’s Day. There is also the feeling among some that Mother’s Day is the worst Sunday of the year for women because every woman in the ward has to sit there and listen to somebody talk about their perfect mother. In comparison, they always feel like they come up short. It can be depressing. Well, can we think through this for a moment.

Little boys love their mothers. When those little boys grow up, they still love their mothers and are very protective of them. Aren’t some of the biggest struggles in many marriages born out of the comparison a man makes between his wife and his mother? So with that in mind, doesn’t it seem silly to say that only men should speak on Mother’s Day? Because what are they going to talk about? Ummm… their perfect mother! I’m just saying, ladies. You might want to rethink the adult female speaking ban.

3. Let’s review the history of Mother’s Day. Mother’s Day was established in 1917. It would be another fifty years before Father’s Day would be officially recognized. Many of the traditions surrounding Mother’s Day were formed in a time when Father’s provided and Mother’s nurtured. In other words, men didn’t do jack at home. It would make sense then, that under those circumstances, it would be a good thing for a man to take on all the responsibilities that were expected of a mother so that every man could be reminded of all the things he was lucky he didn’t have to do on a daily basis. Meanwhile, to give fathers a day to recline in their chair and take a nap, watch sports or just laze around in general was…probably not that different from most other Sundays.

But times have changed. The responsibilities have blurred. If I were to tell my wife that I was the man of the house and therefore I don’t do diapers, don’t fold laundry and most especially never clean the kitchen, I would quickly become the man outside of the house. On the flip side, many mothers now find themselves in the work place and sharing the responsibility of providing for the family. Yet, the traditional ways of celebrating both Mother’s Day and Father’s Day remain fixed.

Maybe for women everywhere, this is fine. Maybe they are happy with the way we approach Mother’s Day. I certainly don’t have a problem with it. I’m happy to continue with things as they are. But can we please stop with the sanctimonious pap about how much women do and men don’t do. (This sanctimonious pap as I call it has never come from my wife. I want that firmly established in the record.) It’s getting old. Most couples I know are attacking the day to day of life and surviving any way they can. When one needs help, they look to the other and are able to expect their partner to be there picking up the slack regardless of whether it is a “man’s responsibility” or “women’s work.”

Now, I’m sure that many will see my rant as anti-female or mysogynistic in some way. I don’t mean it to be. But at the same time, I do have a couple of issues.

As with any kind of type of recognition, I worry we have reached the stage where we have crossed from gratitude to expectation. When a gift is met with, “Why didn’t…” or a request is met with, “I’m a woman and I shouldn’t have to…” I believe something is wrong. I’m not trying to pick on anybody, because this is not an individual thing. This is the expectation I hear the world over.

Also, I’m sorry, but not every man is a worthless lump who is barely hanging on thanks to the herculean efforts of a woman. My wife will do some very nice things to recognize me in five weeks, but society at large? We just went through a massive advertising campaign of, “Shower her with gifts. Get her expensive jewelry. Let her know how much you truly care.” On Father’s Day, pay attention. It will be, “Let dad know he isn’t too bad of a schlub after all. Get him some socks and a card.” End of story. (The obvious exception will be the advertisers for all camping, hunting, fishing and other mancentric retailers, but they will be drowned out by the majority.)

There is a good chance I will regret this post, but, oh well. After five years of trying to please people besides my wife on Mother’s Day, I’m not sure I care anymore.

*****

There is no way to tie this to THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER, and I’m not sure I would want to anyway. But to anyone coming upon this website for the first time, look for my debut novel, THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER to arrive in bookstores on August 13. It is available for pre-order on Amazon.com by clicking here. Please rest assured that my views on Mother’s Day and gender roles in general are not topics in the book.

Changes for the Home Stretch

Posted on by rrapier33

One of the pieces of advice I received when I started shopping THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER to different publishers was to make sure I had a blog. At the time, another blog of mine already existed, but it was much more personal and family-oriented in nature. So, I started this blog with the idea that it would serve as my “author” blog.

Once I had the blog up and running, the next piece of advice I received was that I needed to make sure that I blogged on a regular basis. If I went too long between entries, the blog would cease to be effective. Another article I read also suggested that not only should I be active, but I should be predictably active. The idea is that a blog will attract regular readers much more readily if they can know on a regular basis when they should expect new entries.

For about eight months now, I have tried to do this. To be honest, I’m not sure if anybody noticed but me. But I did it because it is an industry norm. Or so I’m told.

Well, the truth is, I have noticed its effectiveness.  When I started this blog, I was lucky if 15 to 20 people read an entry. Now, on average, a typical entry will get around 50 to 60 views on day one and anywhere from 20 to 30 in the next two days following. Numbers that are certainly not setting the world on fire, but pretty decent considering where I started.

Now, one thing I have noticed is that I have been pretty consistent about publishing a blog post on Monday. I haven’t been quite as consistent with blogging on Thursday (sometimes it slips to Friday and sometimes I have missed altogether), but I have noticed that my Monday posts are routinely more widely read than my Thursday or Friday posts. I don’t know why, but they are.

So, taking into account the numbers and the fact that I am running out of things to say, moving forward, I am going to blog each Monday and that will probably be it. (I fully understand that most people’s response will be, “What is he talking about? Does he honestly think we care when he posts stuff? What kind of ego driven maniac are dealing with here?”)

The reason I am putting this out there (to be completely frank about the marketing strategy I am trying to employ) is to hopefully maximize my efforts with those who have become somewhat regular readers. If they know when to expect something, they will be less likely to miss it. Not every post between now and August will be book related, but the reason this is important is that when they are book related, I am then dependent on those regular readers to help me disseminate some of the more “Major Announcement” kind of things that will be coming in the next few weeks as the release for THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER is now a mere three months away.

What kind of announcements? Well, the cover art should be done very shortly. A new look to the website that will more effectively promote the book will be up soon. Short previews of the novel itself will appear in some posts and hopefully announcements of positive reviews (that’s a big assumption, I know) will post here as well.

But here is my huge request. If you are a friend, family member or complete stranger who is marginally excited for the release of THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER, I really need your help in the coming months. I realize these requests are unfair as they are favors I will likely never be able to repay. But I ask because as anybody who is trying to make their dream a reality in this new world of social media knows: one extra share or one extra like can be the difference of something going viral or something going stagnant. So here are my requests.

1. Share and like posts that deal with “major” announcements regarding THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER.

2. Invite people to “like” my author page, preferably more than once. (Invite more than once, not like)

3. Hopefully some author signings will be announced. If you are one of those people who doesn’t like to pre-order things or distrusts putting your credit card on the internet and happens to live in one of those areas where a signing is announced, please (yes, I have fully reached begging mode here) take the opportunity to visit that store where the signing is scheduled and request a copy be ordered for you ahead of the book’s release. Currently, only one is scheduled for sure and that is the book’s release party at Bookworms Bookstore in Thatcher, AZ.

4. If you live in a state other than Arizona or Utah, I’m probably not gonna be signing anywhere near you. If you have plans to purchase the book, please consider purchasing the book now as a pre-0rder from Amazon.com. You can do so by clicking here.  Pre-order numbers affect the efforts in marketing the book by the publisher as well as bookstores that will consider stocking a book.

If you are a person who hates to be “that guy” or “that girl” who pushes things on their friends and family, I understand. If you would prefer to not “like” every post or not suggest people follow my page, I get it. I won’t let my kids sell their latest PTO stuff door to door because I don’t want my neighbors to feel pressured. I totally understand. But if you think you might be buying this book, this last request is the request that matters most. If you do pre-order it, whether it be through a bookstore or on-line, I thank you more than I can express. It means a great deal to me.  Really, Thank You.

Lastly, thank you to everyone who has been so supportive. I hope when the final product lands in your hands you aren’t extremely let down. If you have followed this blog regularly, then you probably have a good idea of what to expect from the writing. Except now there will be a story included. I can’t believe it is coming so quickly. Thanks again everybody, for all the support you’ve provided and for anything you may do going forward. You’re great.

For anyone hoping for a less pushy post, all I can offer is my latest post from last Thursday in case you missed it. (It wasn’t a Monday post, so it is likely that you did.)

THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER arrives August 13, 2013. Ryan Rapier the author’s facebook page can be found at www.facebook.com/ryanrapierauthor. As noted above, it can currently be pre-ordered on Amazon.com. Just think parents, it will be here just in time for you to enjoy as you send your kids back to school.

 

This Mail Bag (Blog Post) is a Complete Ripoff

Posted on by rrapier33

Do you enjoy being frightened? If so, I encourage you to google the phrases, “book blog” or “book reviews”. Go ahead, do it. I’ll wait.

Okay, assuming that your head didn’t just explode from an overload of information you couldn’t possibly process, and you were able to make it back to this post, you are now likely sitting there stunned at the number of people who blog about writing books, reading books, reviewing books they’ve read or some combination of the three. In fact, what you may not have seen, but trust me when I tell you it does exist, are blogs who sell a service known as book blasting where they will coordinate with a number of other blogs on an author’s behalf, so that your book will be featured on a large number of blogs at the same time. To a first time author, it’s overwhelming, believe me.

Now one of the things that is common on a lot of these blogs are “interviews” with different authors.  What this consists of is the blogger providing a list of questions to an author, who then fills out answers to said questions before e-mailing them back to the blogger. These interviews tend to be pretty generic (as one might expect) and often consist of questions like, “Favorite ice cream flavor” or “Dogs or cats”. At least that is what I have seen on the LDS book blogs. Maybe on other blogs, they move into the more provocative questions like, “Boxers or briefs”, but the truth is, I don’t know. I didn’t look.

But a common thing I hear a lot is that you have to get yourself out there, and these interviews are a way to do that. Well, that got me thinking. You know what would be way more fun than answering generic interview questions? Answering questions from all of my faithful readers and followers. It’s a concept that was designed by one of my favorite sports writers, Bill Simmons. But then I realized, in order for this concept to work, you actually have to have faithful readers and followers.

Or do you?

So, in a continued effort to “get myself out there”, I will be answering questions that cover a wide range of topics that interest me that have been submitted by my faithful fans…all of whom I have made up…along with their questions. We’ll see how this goes.

Do you believe it was an affront to Jesus and Christians everywhere when Denver traded Tim Tebow in order to have a chance at signing Peyton Manning?  B. Graham – Charlotte, NC

No, I do not. I believe the Denver Broncos are now the front runners to win the 2014 Super Bowl. If they had kept Tim Tebow, this would not be the case.

Follow up question: Does your lack of faith in Tim Tebow imply that you hate Jesus?

I sincerely hope not. But I will admit to hating all thing associated with the Florida Gators.

Are you a regular user of DoTerra oils?  M. Kay – Dallas, TX

No, I am not. I have heard great things about their products, but my only experience with them was when I accepted a small sample of an oil that claimed to be an aphrodisiac. However, after applying the oil, my wife reported absolutely no difference in my behavior. I apparently was as pushy and obnoxious as usual. In hindsight, maybe this experiment was a bad one to base any kind of judgment on.

Twitter or Facebook?  M. Zuckerberg – Palo Alto, CA

I recognize the possible irony of my answer as this post will go out via Twitter, but I will definitely have to go with Facebook. Maybe I am showing my age, but the whole point of Twitter is kind of lost on me. With Facebook, I feel a little like it is a huge family and school and mission reunion all rolled into one. I can have back and forth conversations with a lot of different people I have known over the years or just choose to peruse/stalk people’s lives that I have an interest in.

With Twitter, it’s different. To me, it feels like I walk into a room where every single person I am “following” is shouting at each other without taking the time to listen to what anyone else is saying. Having said that, anyone who found this post through Twitter, I obviously was not referring to you. So please be sweet and retweet. (As an aside, the best part of Twitter is also its worst feature: the easy retweet. It’s great when I want to share something without much hassle, but there are some people out there who sit and retweet everything anyone they are following has ever said. It’s ridiculous. I once saw someone brag-tweet that they had been cut off for exceeding their maximum tweets for one day. You have to be well into the triple digits to have that happen to you. And to be proud of that? Searching for a life might possibly be in order.)

What is your favorite movie?  S. Spielberg – Hollywood, CA

(Upfront, I admit that this question is barely a step up from “Favorite Ice Cream” but I don’t care, I wanted to answer it.)

When it comes to favorite movie, I think everyone should be allowed to take a Golden Globes approach as opposed to an Oscar approach, in that everyone should be allowed to have their favorite movie and then their favorite comedy or musical. If a comedy is your favorite movie, there is a possibility you may need more depth as a person. Or at least learn how to lie so it sounds like you have more depth.

Anyway, my favorite comedy or musical would have to be Maverick. I’m still despondent that a sequel was never made. As far as my overall favorite movie, for years and years it was The Hunt for Red October. But since 2008, that honor has belonged to The Dark Knight. (Any and all comments regarding my depth will respectfully be kept to yourself.)

Do you believe that the re-election of Barack Obama as president is a sign that western civilization as we knew it is over?  R. Limbaugh – Palm Beach, FL

No. I believe we reached that point when more than 5 people on earth found Kathy Griffin to be humorous in any way.

What was your favorite part about writing a book?  J. Grisham – Oxford, MS

The bitter arguments that nearly ripped apart my marriage when my wife would be forced to tell me that something I  had written wasn’t very good. She was always right, which only made hearing it that much worse.

What is your deepest, darkest secret that embarrasses  you still today?  O. Winfrey – Chicago, IL

That the character of Edward Cullen is actually based on me during my college days.

Follow up: Are you serious?

Of course not. What kind of moron shares their deepest, darkest secret with the world on a blog. Now if it was Cosmopolitan, People or OK magazine, that would be different.

What historical event, that happened during your lifetime, has most influenced your life?  R. Rapier – Thatcher, AZ

Dead serious here, folks. The 1978 decision by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints to extend the priesthood to all worthy males, which basically meant black men of African descent. Learning about the history that surrounded this event forced me to evaluate all I ever thought I understood about my faith, my religion and my belief system. Some might suggest that thinking too much about this issue could only lead to a negative outcome, but for me it was just the opposite. I believe my faith is stronger today than ever. However, I now do tend to think about some things a little bit differently. Maybe we’ll revisit this in a future blog post. Maybe not. (Picture me shrugging my shoulders to indicate I’m not really sure.)

If you could change one decision you have made in your life, what would it be? 

I would have started to write my book sooner. I love writing. That’s why I keep a blog. (That and it is highly suggested by my publisher and several other writing friends.) I regret that I never took the time to make this dream a reality sooner. But the truth is, the book that I wrote would not be the same had it been written any sooner than when it was. So now that I’ve said that, maybe that’s a decision I wouldn’t change.

*****

Well, that’s it. My first Bill Simmons Mailbag rip-off. I hope he doesn’t have the idea of bolding the questions and leaving the answers unbolded copywrited. Now if anybody out there reading this has additional questions they want to leave in the comments section or through a message on facebook (you can try Twitter, but I offer no guarantees), I would be happy to produce a follow up post to this one. But again, that’s assuming anybody out there is actually reading this. And for anyone discovering ryansrapierwit.com for the first time, now comes the shameless promotional message that accompanies each post.

Ryan Rapier’s debut novel, THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER, hits shelves and Amazon warehouses on August 13. You can pre-order this book at Bookworms Bookstore in Thatcher, AZ or on Amazon.com by clicking here. Or, you can request a copy be ordered for you in advance of the release date at any store where LDS books are sold.

If you, or anyone you know, enjoys liking pages on facebook for no other reason than clicking that little thumbs up gives you a rush, feel free to visit, www.facebook.com/ryanrapierauthor and give our thumbs up a click. We promise twice the adreneline rush of any other page out there or your money back. If you want, you can also follow my twitter handle @RyanRapier, but…whatever.

Why I Admire A Man So Many People Hate

Posted on by rrapier33

I have articulated my frustration with politics many times before. I will not be doing so again right now. But one of my biggest goals when it comes to politics is to keep it from getting personal. I believe our desire to take political discourse into the realms of the personal is why the climate in politics today is so toxic and why no problem is getting addressed in our country.

For those reasons I have defended President Obama as a person. I believe there is a great deal of good in the man. I may not agree with all he stands for and advocates, but I don’t believe politics is what makes a person.

Along those same lines, I came across this article today. I know many liberals and democrats who despise President George W. Bush. And I mean despise him. I’ve never understood it. There were things I disagreed with him on when it comes to politics, but when he spoke or made appearances, I always saw a good man doing his best. Call me naive, but that is what I saw. So it was heartening to see that I was not alone and that this high ranking official in the Clinton administration had many of the same feelings about George W. Bush that I always did. And that he could back up those feelings with personal experiences. So, because I believe it is important to accentuate the positive and raise our discourse, I am linking to this article below. Please take the time to read it. Because this is the type of politics I believe our Savior would have us practice.

http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2013/04/25/democrat-reveals-3-things-liberals-dont-get-about-george-w-bush/

Meanwhile, only three and half months until THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER hits bookstores and mailboxes. If you haven’t taken the opportunity to pre-order it, today’s as good a day as any. You can order at Amazon.com by clicking here. Or you can request a copy be ordered for you at Bookworms Bookstore in Thatcher, AZ, or any bookstore that handles LDS books. Simply walk in and ask to be on the list for THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER, by Ryan Rapier from Cedar Fort Publishing. Your support is appreciated.

One other note; my friend, Brad Hull, of Due West has a request. He and the rest of the band are striking out on their own and could use your help. I would explain it here, but they do a much better job, so to hear what Due West is asking, please follow the link below. If you haven’t heard a Due West song, you are missing out. In today’s world of country music, their amazing harmonies are a rare commodity. Here’s hoping their new venture works out and we hear new Due West music on the radio real soon.

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/duewest/due-west-new-music-project?ref=live

All The News That’s Not Fit To Print

Posted on by rrapier33

On a previous blog, I documented my complete and utter fascination with countdowns. I love countdowns. If I were flipping through the channels one night and came across a countdown of the top 10 favorite office supplies of left-handed circus performers, I would probably watch it. (I hope no one at the A&E channel sees this and gets any ideas. This actually sounds like something they would air.)

Anyway, not only do I love to watch top 10 shows or listen to music countdowns, I also like to produce my own. And today, I want to countdown the stupidest news stories I’ve seen in just the past week or two.

But before I get to that, let me rant for just a second. The reason this list is even possible is because we don’t really even have news shows or news websites anymore. We have political leaning, shock inducing, run-it-into-the-ground analyzing, pumping up people who are famous for absolutely nothing fluff. 90% of all news stories are garbage or non-informative at all. Think about the recent bombing. In the hours (and hours and hours) following the event, every major channel switched to people sitting around guessing or accusing their political opponents or finding people who were near the event who provided absolutely nothing new to the dialogue. Why? It accomplished nothing. Yet any news organization in this country that didn’t join this lemming over the cliff exercise would have been considered derelict in their duties. It’s Redonkulous. (Translation: So stupid I had to make up a word to describe it.)

Okay, rant complete. And now, The Top 10 News Stories From The Last Few Weeks That Suggest We Have Not Evolved Much Since The Time OF The Neandrathals, or The Top 10 NSFTLFWTSWHNEMSTTOTN. Now there’s an acronym with a promising future.

10. The Boston Bombers Were Going To Go To New York – Huh? May I ask just a few questions? Did they actually go to New York? No. Were any bombs actually planted in New York? Not that anyone is aware of.  Is the Mayor of New York an over-protective ninny? Well, probably, but that question is completely unrelated to what we are talking about here.

This story was breaking news for every major news outlet in the country. And yet, THERE IS NO STORY!!!! If either one of the brothers ever said they wanted to one day have children and go to Walt Disney World, should we report that as well? Okay, yes, they may have wanted to plant a bomb. But did they? NO! It was shocking, it was scare-inducing, and maybe it belonged in paragraph 14 of a news story about the bombers. It did not belong as a headline splashed across our front pages. That’s just lazy journalism at its worst.

9. Fraudelent Signatures Helped Get Obama On A State Ballot In 2008 – You’ll be surprised to learn I only saw this headline on Foxnews.com. The purpose of this story? To keep the anger and divisiveness in our nation at all time highs. It serves no other purpose. I mean, do we really think Obama wouldn’t have won the presidency without these fraudulent signatures? As a nation we have got to get over this. This is the same kind of crap that Democrat leaning news organizations pulled for eight years with W. Here is a real news flash: WE ARE NOT THE NCAA! If some obscure violation is found while digging through documents of years past, we don’t rewrite the history books and pretend a presidency didn’t happen. Stories like this do not accomplish anything accept fostering continued resentment that needs no additional fostering. Come on Fox. Be better than that. Leave the bomb throwing to…okay, maybe that’s a bad analogy.

8. Some Weight-Loss Company Is Paying Kim Kardashian To Gain Extra Weight During Her Pregnancy So She Can Lose It All With Their Weight-Loss Program – Admittedly, this is a tabloid headline, but it speaks to bigger problem. WHY DO WE CARE ABOUT ANY OF THE KARDASHIANS?

They don’t DO anything. They have no special talent and they provide nothing to the betterment of our society. I mean, I know this is a little crass, but seriously, the whole family is famous because one of the sisters knows how to have sex while a camera is running. That’s it. And yet, we are constantly force fed every excruciating detail of these parasites’ lives. Just stop already.

7. George Jones Passed Away – Okay, this one isn’t really fair, but I included it mainly because I thought he was already dead.

6. Kate Middleton Shows Off Baby Bump – Seriously folks, leave these poor people alone. This headline isn’t that bad, but it comes on the heels of the infamous “Kate Middleton sunbathing pics”. Pretending to be outraged when this poor woman was photographed in what she believed was a private setting by a photog hundreds of yards away and then writing news stories about how awful this was only kept this embarrassing story alive for about two months. Which is two months longer than it should have been. News stories decrying sleezy practices only give the sleezy practitioners the attention they want. And you know it.

5. Woman’s Car Is Robbed And Her Purse Is Stolen – ….And?

This was the lead, THE LEAD, story on a local Phoenix 10 o’clock news broadcast last night. The reporter explained that this woman had parked her car near a local hiking preserve and “did everything right.” Apparently, doing everything right is leaving your purse in the car, but hiding it really well. I have a couple of thoughts. 1. How about you don’t bring your purse. 2. If you are going to bring your purse, hide it before you arrive at your destination where possibly thieves won’t be watching. But lastly, 3. How is this a real news story?

When Shannon and I were first married, our truck was robbed right outside our apartment. We did “everything right” too, which basically means we locked the car and parked near a street light. But it’s funny, a baseball bat to your side window kind of undoes all of those major precautions. But my point is, this happens everyday, EVERYDAY, in Phoenix and every other city in the world. This is not news. Why doesn’t this channel report on each of the bills being considered by the Arizona legislature that will actually impact each and every Arizona resident. Oh yeah, I forgot. You are a local news program, which means your main job is to scare the tar out of your viewers by completely overblowing the most minor incidents. That, and acting like Hurricane Katrina has hit everytime it rains in the Phoenix valley.

4. Gun Control Bill Hits Snag In Senate

3. Immigration Bill Hits Snag In Senate

2. Senate Resolution Honoring Margaret Thatcher Hits Snag In Senate

How about we report when these yahoos actually accomplish something. I’m so tired of the press giving 24 hour coverage to these petulant children and their tantrums. After all, just like children, attention is all they want. If we withhold it, maybe they would actually do something constructive to get it back. I’m just saying.

1. The NFL Draft – Up front, I am a lover of sports. But this event has gotten out of control. It gets almost as much pre-coverage, post-coverage and analysis as the Super Bowl. And for what? Half of these guys won’t even make it onto the teams that draft them. Who honestly cares if Dufus Hockenstock from Pewter State University runs a 40-yard dash .4 seconds faster than Billy Bob Huckleberry from Alabama? This is the poster child for what is wrong with a 24-hour news cycle whether it be in sports, politics or national news. We forget about what is important and instead, join the hype that is perpetuated by a non-stop media news cycle.

Speaking of blatant Hype, my debut novel, THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER, arrives August 13, 2013. It is available for pre-order now through Amazon.com by clicking here, or, if you live in the Gila Valley, you can pre-order the book at Bookworms Bookstore. Another option is if you have an LDS bookstore in your area, walk on in and request that a copy of THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER be ordered on your behalf. They will appreciate the patronage and I would appreciate the expanded reach. Thanks again to those who read this blog on a regular basis for your patience during this book marketing process.

This Wasn’t In the Brochure

Posted on by rrapier33

I’m going to be straight up. There are a few things about being a parent that I dread almost more than death. In fact, if you catch me on the right day, almost might come out of the equation.

Now I’m not talking about the normal go-tos. The dirty diapers, cleaning up puke and potty training are obvious and frankly, child’s play. No, I’m talking about the insidious things that generally come later in life. Things like:

–Recorder concerts – Now I recognize that I am going to have to attend a lot of different recitals/concerts/sporting events with varying degrees of talent being showcased. That’s not a problem. If a child of mine has an interest in something, I am more than happy to support them and attend said events as they work through the difficult early days prior to their talent and hard work paying off. It is  part of the parent/child contract, and something I am happy to do. But Thatcher schools has this crazy idea that in third grade, they need to give every child (Not those with an interest in music. We are talking every child) a recorder. Wait a minute, I take that back, they require us as parents to go buy every child a recorder. Now for those who don’t know, a recorder is a poor man’s version of the clarinet and, when played incorrectly, is first cousins with a dog whistle. Needless to say, third graders play them incorrectly about 97% of the time. So, they force each of these children to learn a few songs on the recorder (which requires wayyyyy too much practice time at home) and then invite all the parents to come and listen to their children play these songs they’ve been enduring at home for the past month in a concert setting. What you discover is that no child has learned to play the recorder any better than your child has and so if you close your eyes, you realize that the “concert” could just as easily be a mass exercise in torture at your local bird sanctuary. I have now survived two of these blitzkrieg assaults on my eardrums and am steeling myself now for the third one which will take place next year. But I never give up on the dream of some congressman finding an obscure entry in the Obamacare bill that requires the immediate destruction of all recorders nationwide. I know it’s not likely to happen, but come on. Have you seen the size of that bill? And it does purport to encourage preventative healthcare. I can’t think of anything more preventative than taking away all the recorders so I don’t accidently break one over the head of some unsuspecting and undeserving music teacher.

–Pinewood Derby Cars – There are many reasons I am hoping this baby we are expecting is a girl. Daughters have a way of nestling their way directly into a father’s heart. They also do not require the father to make a pinewood derby car each year between the ages of 8 and 10. Oh how I hate this rite of passage that the scouting organization forces upon its members. The main problem is, I am not a skilled worker of wood nor do I own a lot of tools needed for effective wooden car construction. So, I am left with these admittedly imperfect options. I can build it from scratch and have a wonderful bonding experience with my son that is shot to h#@! the minute we put that car on the track and it finishes a good three second behind all of the other cars. That’s what happened to my oldest son on our first attempt. The next option is to go to Hobby Lobby and purchase a pre-cut car that looks awesome, but requires very little from me. I basically have to hand it to my son with a sheet of sandpaper and say, “Get after it, bud.” and then go park myself in front of the TV, providing “expert” examinations on the wood’s smoothness at varying intervals. This is what we did the second year and while the bonding was definitely lacking, my son took first place in his age bracket and was thrilled. The only downside was the nagging guilt I felt at my lack of involvement in my son’s success. This year, I was faced with the perfect storm I’d been dreading for months. It was the only year I would have two sons in the cub scouting program at the same time, requiring me to build two cars instead of one. So, I did what any delinquent father would do and I bought tickets to the ASU/UofA basketball game that was scheduled for the same day as the pinewood derby and I got them and myself the heck out of Dodge. Surprisingly, I felt less guilt with this option than I did with the pre-cut car. Go figure. Anyway, this year worked out so well, I am half thinking of making this a tradition for at least…the next two years. Even if ASU is playing in Pullman, Washington that weekend, I will still have to give it serious consideration.

–The Birds and the Bees Talk – Another reason I am rooting for baby #5 to be a girl is this horrific life moment that any decent parent cannot escape. Shannon and I have a deal. She will take the girls and I will take the boys. I would assume most other couples would have a similar arrangement, but there is no way in Hades I’m ever gonna ask. Because I really don’t want to know if there is a couple out there that doesn’t. Anyway, when my oldest daughter reached this pinnacle of life, my wife got on Facebook and started gathering a hundred different ideas on how best to handle this. She got books and she went into that talk as prepared as if she were facing a final in her last semester of college. She did great. She covered every base and was ready for every question. I was proud of her. As it turned out, she either did such a good job, or my daughter just isn’t a real talker about personal things, but she had relatively few questions to deal with. I was hoping and praying for similar experience.

Anyone who knows my oldest son is knowingly shaking their heads right now. There isn’t a topic on this planet that involves science in any way that isn’t going to get fully dissected by a thousand inquiries. I should have known this. But I didn’t. I think I chose to approach this whole thing with a dash of denial.

So, on a warm spring morning, I took him to get a Dairy Queen blizzard and we went and parked under a tree. I didn’t have books, I didn’t have diagrams and I didn’t have any great ideas provided by my network of social media friends. I just laid it out as best I could. I tried not to hold anything back and then I waited…hoping…gaining confidence with each passing second that he just sat there eating his ice cream.

And then the dam burst.

He started off easy enough, but then he moved to things that I hadn’t thought of until well into my high school years. He even threw in a few questions I couldn’t answer. By and large, when it was over, it had ended up being a good experience for us. And if nothing else, I will be wellllll prepared for son number two in a few years. But it got me thinking.

When my dad finally came to me that fateful day to have the talk, I had already been through a thorough education at the hands of my peers at Duncan Elementary School. Looking back, I knew far more than I should have while at the same time not really knowing anything. This made things tough on my father because I didn’t have any questions. I also think there is a major difference in this younger generation and the one I grew up in. Because I can remember clearly that even if I had had questions, there was no way I was going to ask them of my parents. It would have been way too embarrassing. But my son, to this day, will come back to my wife and I with no shame or embarrassment. It’s actually pretty cool.

But I also realized this week that this level of comfort between child and parent has its downside.

My daughter and I were driving along listening to my iPod when a song came on we have sung along to a hundred times. But this time, there was no sound coming from my daughter’s side of the truck. When the song ended, she said, “I can never sing along to that song anymore.”

I was confused. “Why not?”

My question earned me a huge eye roll and a look that practically screamed, “COME ON, DAD!!! Don’t be such an idiot.” It’s my favorite look. It makes me feel so good. Anyway, she combined her expression with a mumbled, “I just…I just can’t.”

And that’s when it hit me. The title of the song references something that can be taken two very different ways. Very tentatively, I asked if that reference was the problem.

“Uh, YEAHHH!!!”

I have never experienced such conflicted emotions in my life. It is one thing for my son to be so open about personal things. It is just kind of who he is. But my daughter…Never! So the fact that she would be this open with me was like the ultimate validation of my parenting.

On the other hand. I was horrified. I have always wanted to live in a fantasy world where my thirteen-year-old daughter never learned of such things. Never mind I knew what she was talking about at her age, in my mind, she should never have known.

And another thing. I chose to assume at thirteen that my parents didn’t know anything about this…act I’m referring to. And it was guaranteed I would never breath a word of it to them.

So there I sat in my truck trying not to look as stunned as I felt. I attempted to casually talk with her and assure her the song did not contain a line she thought it did. I hope it went okay. I think it did.

But I will admit to one thing. Part of me wishes that the old teenage/parent version of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell still existed. A much bigger part of me is grateful it doesn’t. I would not trade the relationship I have with my daughter for anything. That night was unique in that most of my family was out of town and so she and I got to eat pizza and watch a movie mostly on our own. It was a night I will not soon forget.

But while changing a dirty diaper or cleaning throw up is beyond nasty in the moment, within minutes, it’s over. It’s gone. This reminder that my children are growing up in a world filled with the vilest garbage is not fading at all. And so, although I might prefer to turn a blind eye, I will do everything I can to keep the channels of communication open. I may not always like what I see or hear, but at least there will be a better pay off than what I get from those infernal recorder concerts.

SHAMELESS BOOK PLUG ALERT

My book THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER, arriving August 13, 2013, deals with the difficulty of a parent communicating with a teenage child. It might also touch on one man’s frustrations with aspects of scouting. It can be pre-ordered through Bookworms Bookstore in Thatcher, AZ or from Amazon. com by clicking here.  You may also request a copy be ordered for you through any bookstore selling LDS fiction.

If you are not currently a fan of my author page on Facebook, please take a moment and “like” it for updates on cover art, interviews and reviews that come out as the release date draws closer. That link is www.facebook.com/ryanrapierauthor

Thank you to everyone for your continued support.

Sumo-Sized Praise for THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER

Posted on by rrapier33

As I have previously mentioned on this blog, and as anyone who has ever attempted creative writing can attest to, writing a novel is not a one-shot-and-your-done process. You often have to write something, come back to it and realize you have no business thinking you can write, trying again, coming back and realizing you still have no business thinking you can write, taking your work to your spouse who confirms that you have no business thinking you can write, and so on and so forth until after five, six or twenty attempts later, you finally have a decent draft you can present to peers for a critique. When you finally get to that point, it can be very nerve wracking because you have arrived at a place where you realize you can’t do much better. You think to yourself, “Either I have talent or I don’t, because I cannot look at this story one more time without setting it on fire and then finding a dark corner to hopefully drink myself into oblivion.”

Okay, maybe that’s a tad dramatic, but it’s not far off. (By the way, your spouse will likely be more than happy to join you in setting it fire if she hasn’t done so already without your knowledge.)

So for me, after I had been through this gauntlet of hell, there was one logical choice when it came down to seeking a “peer review” from a fellow author.  I put peer review in quotes because my experience up until then was hacking my way through one unpublished novel while she, on the other hand, had published four. It’s kind of like calling your local karaoke star and George Strait peers. Anyway, the person who seemed the most logical was fellow Gila Valley author, Jennifer Griffith.

Jennifer, as mentioned, has published four novels. Her latest, BIG IN JAPAN, a story about a 300 pound man who finds himself unexpectedly caught up in the world of sumo wrestling, has even reached as high as #9 on the Amazon sales list for sports novels. And she knows a thing or two about critiquing manuscripts. Thankfully, she agreed to take a look at mine.

It turned out I couldn’t have been more fortunate. She provided a great perspective and gave me very sound advice that led to an overall strengthening of my story. She was also very supportive during the process of submitting my manuscript to agents and publishers. I owe her a great deal.

Anyway, when THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER got picked up by Cedar Fort Publishing, instead of saying thank you, I instead asked her for another favor. I asked if she would be willing to provide an endorsement. Once again, she was gracious and willing.

So first of all, let me say how much I appreciate Jennifer Griffith’s help and support through this entire process. And second of all, let me express how grateful I am for the following words that are extremely kind. Thanks, Jen. Her endorsement now follows:

Todd Landry would be the slightly cynical, charming everyman – if his life weren’t tinged by the tragedy of the death of his wife. Marci died too soon, leaving him with three kids and no idea what to do next, how to deal or how to progress.

He’s been putting on a good face for his children, but his parents and siblings know everything’s not okay and have insisted he get some counseling. To appease them, he’s been going faithfully to Dr. Schenk, a detached psychiatrist who’s ready to drop Todd as a patient because he refuses to speak in therapy sessions week after week. The doc issues an ultimatum: Todd must write or be dropped as a client. Todd knows the only thing keeping his family off his back is that he meets with Dr. Schenk, so he (extremely) reluctantly agrees. And he starts writing a blog.

What ensues in Ryan Rapier’s debut novel The Reluctant Blogger, is the unfolding of a life. It’s a life rich with history, emotion, and characters so true to life you’ll swear you’ve met them in church or are related to them yourself. Todd’s obstacles and efforts toward healing are fraught with emotional and social danger, and with frequent hilarious predicaments, all told through Todd Landry’s dry wit and his incisive descriptions of the friends and family that populate his world.

Rapier has an uncanny ability to take the reader from laughter to wrenching emotion in a matter of paragraphs. The whole page-turning journey is a wonderful roller coaster ride with characters the reader is invested in from page one—all the way to the highly satisfying ending. – Jennifer Griffith, Author of BIG IN JAPAN

BIG IN JAPAN is available in select bookstores and on-line at amazon.com. You can also visit her blog at www.authorjennifergriffith.com or you can like her Facebook author page as well at facebook.com/jennifergriffithauthor.

THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER will arrive in bookstores and mailboxes August 13, 2013. It is currently available for pre-order at Bookworms Bookstore in Thatcher, AZ, or on-line at Amazon.com by clicking here. If you aren’t currently liking Ryan Rapier’s author page on facebook, please do so for no other reason than we are a self-absorbed society that judges ourselves by how many people are our “friends” or “like” us…and I’m no different. The page can be found www.facebook.com/ryanrapierauthor

Dreams Are For Rookies…And People From The Gila Valley

Posted on by rrapier33

Confession Time: I hate American Idol. I haven’t always hated American Idol, but I’ve never been a fan. However, add Nicki Minaj to anything and my like vs. hate needle will quickly shift toward the extreme dislike.

Truth be told, I’ve only watched one half of one season. That would be the David Cook vs. David Archuleta season and it mildly held my interest, but when it was over, so was my desire to see any more.

One of my biggest complaints has always been the audition process. I just hate seeing people desperate to get on TV make fools of themselves, or even worse, people who truly believe they have talent, who…WOW…Just Don’t!

Because of my feelings about American Idol, I have never watched America’s Got Talent, The X-Factor, and up until three weeks ago, The Voice.

But then word started seeping out that a local boy from good ol’ Thatcher, Arizona was going to be making an appearance on the NBC show. I don’t believe I’ve ever met Ryan Innes, but I know his parents very well and other members of his family are some of my very best friends. So, three weeks ago, out of loyalty, I tuned in to the premiere of The Voice.

You know what? The show ain’t that bad. I genuinely like each of the judges. They are entertaining in their back and forth with each other and you get the sense that they actually enjoy working together. They also don’t get in the way of the people who are performing.

Which brings me to my favorite part of this show. From the first night, the worst performance I have seen was still pretty darn good. They don’t force the viewers to wade through hours of off-key train wrecks. You get right to the good stuff. And the added dimension of the judges not knowing what the peformers look like and having to make judgements on the voice alone is actually very intriguiging. Overall, I have been enjoying this show a great deal. The one thing I wasn’t seeing was Ryan Innes.

Then, last night, we got word that after three weeks, he would finally be on. So, my family and I settled in for the duration. And we waited…and waited…and finally after the full two hour broadcast, (I missed the entire NCAA basketball finale between Louisville and Michigan. How is that for friendship and loyalty? I should be getting an ice cream cone or something. Anyway…) Ryan showed up as the final act for the night. Now we have seen four episodes prior to this one so we knew that if you get showcased in the final position of the night, it’s going to be pretty good for you. And…to see how it went, click here.

I have to say that even though I have never met him, I am very proud of Ryan. But my favorite part of that video are the shots of the family. You see, dreams are funny things. You don’t wake up one day with a dream and walk down to The Voice studios and make it a reality. They are often years in the making. And almost no one makes them happen alone.

I know that Ryan has worked incredibly hard in order to get to that stage we saw him on last night. But I also know he wouldn’t have made it there without the support and strength provided by the people waiting for him in that backstage room jumping up and down, clapping and crying, cheering him on. I know that the joy they felt in that moment was made all the more sweet because there have been many times when things didn’t go so well, and instead of celebrating, their job was to console.

Now, because this is my blog and because I am still in the process of plugging a book, I will now direct this post back to me. Please know that I am not so self-aware that I don’t recognize how me-centric I appear. Anyway, I was so happy for Ryan Innes to be able to achieve a little more of his overall dream last night. It was interesting for me to watch because it also caused me to reflect.

Earlier that day, Shannon and I had traveled down to Mesa and during the course of the conversation, we began talking about the number of people we know who are trying to get a book published. And my wife made the comment, “Do you realize how lucky you are?”

The truth is, I do. However, I probably don’t realize it enough. Because it’s true, I am extremely lucky. And even on days where I stress out because I have no idea what else I can do to spread the word and generate interest in my book, I need to remember how truly fortunate I am. I am living my dream. And like most dreams, it hasn’t come easy, but because of the support of my wife, my family and some very dear friends, I was able to be in a position to be lucky.

So to the entire Innes family, I want to express my deepest congratulations.  Last night was awesome. Ryan was awesome. And regardless of what happens next, Ryan Innes killed it in front of millions of people on network television. No one can ever take that away. To my friend, Brad Hull, I again extend my congrats on the milestones he and his fellow Due Westers continue to achieve. If they never find themselves headlining at major arenas around the country and world, they still have sung on the stage of the Grand Ol’ Opry. That is their moment that belongs to them and no one else.

And to myself? You, Mr. Rapier, are one lucky bastage who probably doesn’t deserve this opportunity you’re receiving. But even if the book flops and it is the only one you ever publish, you need to remember that moment on December 21st, 2012, when the e-mail from Cedar Fort publishing hit your in-box. It’s the stuff dreams are made of. And remember that you’re lucky, because dreams don’t just happen for everybody.

Ryan Innes can be seen on THE VOICE, Monday and Tuesday nights on NBC.

THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER drops August 13, 2013. It is currently available for pre-order at Bookworms Bookstore and from Amazon.com. Please visit Ryan Rapier’s author page on Facebook at facebook.com\ryanrapierauthor and like us if you like.

Random Streams of Consciousness

Posted on by rrapier33

After all the sugar that entered my blood stream over the weekend, it is hard for me to maintain a single coherent thought for more than a minute. Therefore, today, I am going to comment on a topic until I lost interest or focus and then move on to another topic.  We’ll see how it goes.

– Speaking of sugar, why is it that every major historical achievement that warrants its own holiday has been reduced to seeing how much unhealthy food a person can ingest in a day? For instance, how do we honor the truly blessed event of our forebears discovering this land of opportunity and plenty? By eating pie. Not a piece of pie, a pie…each…maybe plural. And you can top that pie off with some turkey and rich mashed potatoes dripping with gravy. But regardless of what the main course holds, you better have 36 pies waiting in the wings on Thanksgiving day or people will begin to question your level of gratitude.

Or how about the birth of the Son of God, the person responsible for each of us being able to return to live with God?  That’s right, Candy Canes, Sugar Cookies and any sort of imalgimation of chocolate, peanut butter, popcorn/rice crispies, and frosting. And nothing says Glory to God in the highest like a reenactment of the nativity topped off by several glasses of egg nog…and cake balls. (Who invented cake/oreo balls? Seriously, I don’t think I’ve ever simultaneously loved and hated one person more in my entire life.)

And finally, how does the modern day Christian celebrate the single greatest act ever performed for the benefit of all mankind? With ham, of course. And as many Cadbury chocolate eggs as you can scrounge because you know full well the day after Easter their black market value will quadruple.

So, as I step on the treadmill today after a complete meltdown this weekend, (my wife had the nerve to tell me Saturday night to stop eating the ice cream in the freezer. I calmly explained that the only way that was going happen was if she stopped buying the ice cream to put in the freezer in the first place.)  I will start again and work tirelessly over the next month to undo the damage I inflicted on myself in three short days. Hey, that should be just in time for Memorial Day. AWESOME!!!

– For those who may have wondered, I didn’t win my golf tournament. I didn’t even come close. And I think the reasons are, #1, I am not that good of a golfer. #2, I need to quit getting so excited in the days leading up to this event. I was so overly amped that I barely slept three or four hours the night before and then spent the first six holes unable to breathe out of excitement. By the end of those six holes? I was down 13 shots. Yeah, that’s not a good recipe for success right there.

– Letting your kids make decisions for themselves has got to be the hardest thing to do in the world. This morning, my son was so excited that it was April Fool’s Day (AFD). He desperately wanted to wrap his arm up and put it in a sling for school. Now think through this with me for a second. He wanted to dibilitate himself for an entire day by removing the use of one arm so that he could yell, “April Fools” during the last five minutes of school. Who really gets punk’d in this situation? I can only imagine everyone around him who had the full function of both arms all day long reacting with a barely interested, “Huh? Oh…good one.”

Good one that is, until he mentioned that his best friend pulled the same prank a couple of years ago. Now take another moment to think about this.  Who are you trying to prank on AFD? Your friends, of course. So…do we really think your best friend, the same guy who has performed this clever act of subterfuge before is gonna be taken in by this? My son’s response, “Well, it was two years ago and he only had a wrist brace.” Okay, got me there, son. He won’t see this coming at all. But this is the same son who demanded to wear a neck tie with his polo shirt to school. I tried desperately to stop him, but he assured me everyone else was doing it. Turns out, he was right. At least five other boys were taking part in this fashion travesty. I don’t know what that says about his friends, but it reminded me that sometimes, I just have to let things go.

– A trend that has started in the last few years is having video trailers for books, much like previews to a movie. If my book is going to have one, I have to produce it myself and I have had some initial conversations regarding just that. However, I was hoping that I might get some input. I know not many people like to respond to blog posts, me included, but if you have a moment, please tell me if you have ever seen a book trailer. And if so, did it help in your decision to seek out a book that you might not have otherwise read? I’m just curious.

-Finally, a personal request that if you are a reader and interact with other readers, please introduce them to this blog or send them to facebook.com/ryanrapierauthor on facebook so they can like my page and get updates regarding THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER as its release date gets closer. In the next couple of months, the cover art from the book as well as previews from early chapters will appear on this blog and hopefully heighten people’s interest in the story.

So if you know a family that might be interested in a humorous LDS novel about life, love and relationships, set a date to ask them to visit this blog by, invite them over for dinner and if they accept, I can just happen to be there as well to share a short message about my book. Oh wait, that sounds a little too familiar. Never mind. If you could just mention my page to anyone who might find it interesting, I could ask for nothing more.  Thank you.

THE RELUCTANT BLOGGER arrives in bookstores August 13, 2013. It is currently available for pre-order through amazon.com by clicking here or through Bookworms Bookstore in Thatcher, AZ.